Hello. I see you have come back to taunt me on this night in particular. Why today?

Today when I don’t have to be at work and I am not required to need you? Why, when I clearly don’t need you in my life. I have not called for you (I would never do that) I have not done anything to attract you to me that I know of.

Do you know just how inconvenient you are? You man seem like you are helping in some way but you really aren’t. Do you get pissed when someone fights back? What do you do when they do and your attempts fail? Do you realise how counter-productive you really are to people. And I am an exception because as I mentioned sometimes… yes “sometimes” you are useful to me. Though I think you know this and pick your attacks on me differently.

Do you realise that you could be so much more of use to a niche group of people. New mothers for example that quite frankly sometimes struggle. Or people that drive for a living and stretch long hours. Do you get some kind of kick out of what you do? I mean it must be fun for you or you wouldn’t do it right?

Are you in secret cahoots with the other me? Does he call to you when he feels it’s time to punish me in some way? Does it mean he is manifesting? Because I didn’t feel him emerging this time. Is he watching me suffer as well as you are? Sitting on a couch in the back of my mind swilling down beer and munching on pork rinds, then leaving me to clean up “your” mess?

Or is this all just one sick joke devised by him to make me paranoid that also adds to your game because it aids you in your job… Why do you even exist? You haven’t exactly made yourself popular in what you do, you are like the traffic wardens of the world, or the tax men collecting money that people earn just because the government say so.

What do you get out of your job exactly? It is job satisfaction, are you just that evil?

I mean who in the fuck decides… I know when I grow up I want to be insomnia…